2006-08-29

Schadenfreude



When I was a kid, between the ages of 10 to 18, I had a bully who conveniently lived three houses down from me.

My mom liked to say, "People like that always cook their own goose."

I never believed her. It's hard for a kid to think that way especially when you're in a headlock.

mom:“Where is your Halloween candy?”
me:“Yeah, um, David Fleming stole it.”
mom:“People like that always cook their own goose.”
me:“Right, but I still don't have my Halloween candy or my dignity.”
mom:“Here, take some of your sister's candy. She won't mind.”
mom:“Where is your new bike?”
me:“Yeah, um, David Fleming stole it.”
mom:“People like that always cook their own goose.”
me:“Right, but I still don't have my bike or my dignity.”
mom:“Here, use your sister's bike. She won't mind.”



So, you can imagine my glee when I heard the news that a cop shot and killed David Fleming.

"It's my life and I'll do what I want!" -- you certainly did...until the policeman shot you.

Good call, Mom!

The goose is cooked. Cooking time? 36 years.

6 comments:

  1. No way. Have you told your mom?

    ReplyDelete
  2. It reminds me of that part in the Wizard of Oz, where it seems so wrong, yet feels so right.

    It went a little something like this:
    Ding dong, the witch is dead,
    The wicked witch, the wicked witch...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yes, my mom knows. She was the person who told me about it.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I share a similar experience here:
    http://blog.geezeo.com/2007/07/25/how-much-does-an-ahole-cost/

    ReplyDelete
  5. [...] a year ago I published an article about the sweet demise of my childhood bully. I know you probably think I’m sick in the head, and I am. But luckily, I have someone to [...]

    ReplyDelete