White Sponsorship

My son received his team assignment for Little League baseball. The team is sponsored by the ¹ club.

I'm a little concerned. I asked around about them, but very few people knew anything about them. One person, the head of the local Little League, said it was a club for white supremacists. Interesting. My son is playing for Hitler's army.

One guy's word isn't good enough for me. So, I checked on the inter-web. Nothing. There is not a single website containing any information about them. That's strange. What kind of business/club would have no information about themselves available in the inter-web?

The next day I called the borough administration office for my home town. I'm not a quitter.

woman #1:	“Borough administration office. How can I help you?”
me:	“Hi. I was wondering if you could help me track down some information about a local business or organization?”
woman #1:	“We sure can. What is the business name?”
me:	“It's the club.”
woman #1:	“...What kind of information were you looking for?”
filter catch:	“Are they a bunch of racists?”
me:	“They're the sponsor of my son's baseball team, and I just want to know a little more about them.”
woman #1:	“I'm sorry. I can't help you with that.”
filter catch:	“No you can't because they'll burn your house down.”
me:	“Is there someone else there I can speak to about this?”
woman #1:	“Just give me a moment. I'll find someone to help you.”
(muffled sounds -- as she holds her hand over the receiver.)
woman #2:	“Sir? You how can I help you?”
filter catch:	“Sure, just act like the first woman told you nothing.”
me:	“I'm looking for any information you might have about the club.”
woman #2:	“They're a service organization sir. They do charitable things for the community.”
filter catch:	“Charitable things like...I don't know...rid our town of minorities?”
me:	“OK. Who's in this club?”
woman #2:	“They have an exclusive membership. You have to be sponsored by a member to become a member.”
filter catch:	“It also helps if you have a shaved head and spider web tattoo on your elbow.”
me:	“Do you have any other information?”
woman #2:	“They're a service organization sir. They do charitable things for the community.”
me:	“Right, you said that already. Do you have any other information?”
woman #2:	“...We haven't had any complaints about them... What were you interested in?”
filter catch:	“No? No complaints about lynchings?”
me:	“Anything. I have a name, an address, and brief generic description of what they do. Can I call them?”
(awkward silence)
woman #2:	“...ah...You...can do that.”
me:	“...OK, thanks for your help.”
woman #2:	“You're welcome.”

Weird.

The uniforms haven't been delivered yet. I wonder if we'll get white hoods instead of hats.

¹ Yes. I'm a total coward and don't like burning crosses on my front lawn. I will say that the name of the club contains the word "White" and the name of a 2D shape with only one edge.